Saturday, December 4, 2010

December Dreams.

The weather here is finally reflecting the season.  I find myself not walking outside without a coat over my already bulky sweater, and the ensemble is usually topped off with a scarf and boots.  Granted, I only have one pair of boots, so the soles of the heels are already getting worn down from walking to class everywhere.  Which saddens me to no end :(  ...stupid Freshman Hill...

But usually I'm not really a cold weather person, but recently, with my amplified vulnerability, I've found myself retreating inside clothes with an intensity that I've never really felt in the past.  Plus, I consider winter clothes to be a kind of challenge--they can either be effortlessly chic in their layers or they can make you look enormous, which is a pickle I am determined to solve.  With my newfound appreciation of cold weather though, I've started taking evening walks.  They only last about half an hour (I don't really have time for much more with exams looming), but they've become a sort of therapy for me.  I initially started spending most of that time in silent contemplation (or at least trying to), but my ten o'clock ritual has now morphed into time for me to just think.  I've thought about everything on these walks--life, love, time--and by the end, all of my thoughts have been collected to form a kind of prayer.  I usually end up praying for strength because it is the place in my life where I falter the most.  Strength to keep moving during hard times, strength to be myself, strength to not be afraid to love...  I find myself more and more turning towards my faith, and I really like the transformation this has brought me thus far.

I have a lot of goals this December...well, maybe it would be better to call them dreams because I don't think that all of them are exactly tangible. 

1. As much as I'd like to put it at the back of my mind, school is definitely one of my highest priorities right now.  I have a ten-page paper for STAC that is absolutely eating at me (yet I am still nonetheless unmotivated to work on it), and then I have exams in my other classes as well.  My only saving grace at this point is the fact that I somehow did well on my calc tests throughout the semester.

2. Pray the rosary every day of Advent.

3. Start working out (I'm going to Florida after Christmas!) -- bathing suit, here I come :)

4. Reconnect with my high school friends.  I shamefully admit that I've been negligent in keeping in touch with most of the people that I considered to be my best friends last year.

5. Find the perfect Secret Santa gift!

6. Get in the Christmas spirit!

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